Ferdousi is a girl of 22 studying in a renowned private university. She is good-looking and lovely in appearance. Two month ago, her settle marriage day was fixed and final but it was fully broken down due to the curse of dowry. Her father is a service holder in general. He did not arrange the demand of the party of bridegrooms. Finally the marriage ceremony did not proceed on any more at that moment. After deal with the real affairs, Ferdousi decided that she would not think about further marry right now. She has determined that to continue her regular study.
She wants to be a self -dependant girl and overcome the obstacles which were happened in her life. A few numbers of victims can take such decision in this country still now, but she can taken because of her father is capable to carry on her educational expenses even though he is a limited earner. So it was quietly possible for her to take such kind of decision. But it is appreciated for taking “marriage later first to be self-dependant” like serious decision while her family trying arrange her marriage else where after that incident.
Only a few numbers of one like Ferdousi can take right decision whereas maximum ones can not take such kind of decision for social outlook and familial pressure. In the most cases we see, the girls whose marriages are being broken down due to dowry or same one problem, it is very hardship to the parents to arrange marriage for their daughter again. As a result, they have to lead very inhuman life and social discrimination. It is the real feature of our society. Finally dowry deaths, dowry violence etc are being induced for dowry demands or social discrimination. So dowry is referred to as a deeper disease that relates to how our social degradation indicate unvalued dishonor to women.
Gender discrimination not only a miserable existence but also this discrimination creates various spheres of deprivation of our girls. The dowry is one of the curses to decline their rights. This curse is one of the paramount obstacles to the society to establish women rights. Social researcher Mohammad Khairul Alam said: “The hope of dowry is not only the expectation of bridegroom and his father but also his sister and mother in spite of being women. So, to remove dowry from the society men and women should come forward to equally”.
A social research on Raky community operated by Rainbow Nari O Shishu Kallyan Foundation at Lalbagh area in Dhaka has shown that women are deprived from inherent assets. In the occasion of marriage ceremony, a lot of money or asset is given to the bridegroom which means dowry system. This kind of social culture inspires dowry in the society. So to decrease dowry, it is crying need to insure to get inherent assets for the women.
Dr. Ahasun Habib of Asian University of Bangladesh said: “The system of social security in our society can not ensure the women’s rights exactly. In family level, women are deprived of their accurate rights. In such kind of different circumstances a bride also thinks to get some father’s property or valuable something which brings prestige in her new family. So dowry system spreads its roots in the society in different reasons. If it can ensure the real rights of daughters, this kind of evil system may remove.
The opinion of social researcher S.M. Mostak Ahmed, “Polygamy also poses various troubles in the society. Several ancidents of polygamy are occurred for dowry poor and marginalize regions. In spite of having permitted polygamy in our laws and also having social acceptance, but maximum times the victimize or women are suffering from polygamous abuse due to illiteracy of the community. We should encourage stopping polygamy to stop dowry and marriage registration should be compulsory”.
Misplacement of polygamy creates a lot of problems in the context of particularly Bangladesh. In the susceptible area of all over country, it seems to be a great opportunities to many miscreants for getting extra money or assets from the parents of bride, as dowry.After few days the bride confronts a lot of familial and social problems which are generated common social degradation. Sometimes they do not get proper judgments. In this case, Rainbow Nari O Shishu Kallyan Foundation’s surveyors think, it is possible to overcome the downer problems if we start up the marriage registration and conditional polygamy.
Source: The New Nation
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